We Wish You An Alt. Christmas!

by StephenMorris
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on 22 December 2011 in Features

Christmas. We love Christmas at Shout4Music. But very often the music that accompanies the festive season gets a little bit…repetitious. While Noddy Holder and Roy Wood may think Christmas really has come every day with each cheque from the PRS, we thought we'd look beyond the horizon to see what other festive tunes are available for the yuletide season.

Can't see your favourite Christmas song? Chip in with your festive tunes below.

The Birthday Party — 'Dead Joe'

Where Santa finds himself trapped in a Ballardian pile-up of twisted metal and autoerotic love, his blood-soaked beard tangled in a sculpture of severed limbs and dead apostles. Nick Cave is the scariest Santa ever. Get it here. (Mark Nicholls)

Booker T And The MGs – 'Jingle Bells'

Booker T And The MGs' 'In The Christmas Spirit' is a little disappointing in places. The people who brought you 'Green Onions' and the music from the cricket seem to come unstuck with their treatments of traditional carols – as if worried they'll cause offence. The result is a sound you'd expect from a chilly Methodist church with a nonagenarian organist and a congregation of four.

Fortunately, there's less restraint with the more secular tunes, as evidenced here with jazzy variations swimming around with ease amid those pre-requisite jingling bells. Lovely. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Eels – Everything's Gonna Be Cool This Christmas

         

Mr E's poignant songwriting style is perfect for Christmas songs – there's a bittersweetness to this that captures the heightened emotions that tend to go with the season.  Plus, the line 'Baby Jesus, born to  rock' is sheer genius.  Get it here. (Alan Ashton-Smith)

Emmy The Great And Tim Wheeler – 'Zombie Christmas'

What else do you need to know about this song. The excellent title pretty much says it all. If someone hasn't already bought the film rights for the concept, then I'll do it myself. 'Zombie Christmas' is a bubble gum pop addition to the Christmas cannon – with an extra dash of undead menace thrown in: 'I don't want to have my last Noel/we better kick those zombies back to hell.' Glorious. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

The Ethiopians – 'Ding Dong Bell'

As found on surely the most specialist of albums in the world: 'Children's Reggae Christmas'. That's right. They're not just Christmas songs. They're not even just children's Christmas songs. Oh no. They're Children's REGGAE Christmas songs. Expect a sunny drenched melody here – a million miles away from 'Frosty The Snowman' or 'In The Bleak Midwinter'. It is, nevertheless, full of goodwill and an enormous amount of cheer. Guaranteed to raise a smile. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Half Man Half Biscuit – 'It's Clichéd To Be Cynical At Christmas'

Charlie Brooker has had some difficulty of late trying to persuade people he actually quite likes Christmas. Such are the perils of being so world weary and misanthropic for the other 364 days of the year.

Nigel Blackwell of Half Man Half Biscuit must be able to identify with Mr. Brooker's problem only too well. He's usually singing about his grievances with everyone from 'Singing from the roof of the Barbican' to sullen garage shop assistants working the night shift.

Here though, Blackwell joins in the festivities with his own brand of Christmas cheer as he snipes against the snipers: 'Now, how did I guess you were going to express your disdain at the crane with the bright fairy lights.' A good point very well made. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

The Leisure Society – 'Christmas Mistakes'

There's much to love on this year's 'For Folk's Sake It's Christmas' album (Kathryn Williams, Darren Hayman, Cocos Lovers to name but three), but you've got to love a bit of The Leisure Society.

Here, complete with the usual ukuleles and sumptuous orchestration (Belle And Sebastian meets The Divine Comedy), The Leisure Society outline a typical Christmas in many households with good intentions 'descend into civil war'. It's funny 'cos it's true. Get the whole album here. (Stephen Morris)

Low - 'If You Were Born Today' 

From their own 'Christmas' EP. It's about how if Jesus had appeared today, we'd have probably topped him when he was eight. There's a message of hope if you scratch at it fairly hard, but generally it's fucking miserable, which is a fair analogy of the event. Get it here. (Alaster Kirk)

Aimee Mann – 'You're A Mean One, Mr Grinch'

A fantastic jazzy shuffle into the world of Dr. Seuss as Aimee “I hate vampire towns” Mann tells the story of The Grinch stealing Christmas – with a little help from a friend: 'you're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce' runs one jibe aimed at the season's villain. That'll learn him. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Elvis Presley – 'Blue Christmas'

In the interests of being a lovelorn contrarian, while everyone's celebrating at Christmas  - for what reason, I'm not sure - I tend to take to my room and pine for past loves and likes and this song helps me get in the mood. You should all try it some time - it's a blast. Get it here. (Christopher Moffatt)

The Raveonettes – 'The Christmas Song'

I always associate The Raveonettes with eerie and melancholic indie-rock, but 'The Christmas Song' is just so lovely and peaceful, it gives you a different side to the band. It still has their trademark ingredients though: close two-part vocal harmonies and retro sounding instrumentation. But then there're sleigh bells! It's basically just a perfectly cute indie Christmas song. Get it here. (Arusa Qureshi)

Bob Rivers – 'Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear'

'Later on if you wanna, we can dress like Madonna'. Fancy a bit of light transvestism for Christmas? This cheeky number is delivered with the sort of variety show stopping splendour you'd expect from a Morecambe and Wise Christmas special. If you haven't heard this corruption of 'Winter Wonderland' you clearly haven't lived. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Kate Rusby – 'Kris Kringle'

If it's something gentler you want this yuletide, try out Kate Rusby's gorgeous album 'While Mortals Sleep' which is filled to the rafters with beautiful folkish interpretations of Christmas carols and other traditional songs, such as this one. The Yorkshire born songstress allows her accent to infuse her vocals – with beautiful results. 'Who comes this way?' becomes 'who c'uhms this way?' making her songs all the more charming and elegant. Utterly beautiful. Add in a muted trumpet, accordion and acoustic guitar and it's a right treat. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Sufjan Stevens – 'Get Behind Me Santa'

Most of the songs on Stevens' 'Songs For Christmas' are cover of tradition Christmas songs and carols reinforcing a faith more muted on his other albums. But every now and then he treats us to an original tune such as this one. 'Get Behind Me Santa' (see what he did there!) is a nod to Keith Emerson's organ trickery, outlining a child's confusion over St. Nick's intentions on Christmas Eve. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

The Stiff Little Fingers – 'White Christmas'

No genre is immune to the allure of the Christmas song. Punk's dalliance with the festive season comes with this suitably thrashy live rendition from Belfast's finest. It starts off a a decent, noisy lick and gets more and more chaotic from thereon in. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

Vince Guaraldi Trio – 'Christmastime Is Here'

Ah. Gorgeous. A muffled piano and a children's choir who can actually sing. There's something rather magical about this show, shuffling tune which is entirely evocative of the yuletide season – as anyone who has heard the song on the soundtracks of 'Charlie Brown's Christmas' or 'The Royal Tenenbaums' will testify. Get it here. (Stephen Morris)

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